Well life has been a little crazy the past couple weeks. I'm trying to find a job and going on so many different intterviews. I wish I could just be working already. I hate job searching and I really hate interviews. I get all nervous and make myself look like an idiot instead of just telling them what I'm trying to say. It's rather annoying. I mean I guess I don't do too bad but I still don't like them. And the biggest problem I have is I really don't want to work at Subway but thats the experience I have. Grrrrrr! It's so frustrating!
So on Monday I found out that I am pregnant. According to my last period I am about 4 weeks and 3 days along. My due date would be November 15th. I have not yet been to the doctors so these dates and things are not set in stone but it's a start. I have not yet made an appointment because I am waiting for my insurance to come through. As soon as it does I will make an appointment and let everyone know whats up for sure. =)
Right now things are a little tough. Trying to find a job down here is a lot harder than I thought it would be and money is short. We are making it through the best we can it's just a little difficult. I am so glad by the time I have this new baby Joey will be out of school though and have a good job. We just have to wait a few more months and things will be so much easier for us! It's just the waiting game that sucks! But I am happy to be down here with my Joey. I miss Jordan a lot but what can I do ya know? I'm glad to have my Josh with me and I'm so happy to be bringing another addition into our family! So although things are a little hard right now I'm trying to keep a bright outlook on things and be as happy as I can!=)
Well off to finish getting ready for another interview! Wish me luck!!
Friday, March 11, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
New beginings...
So starting over once again has been hard! I am farther away from the people I love than I have ever been before. I miss my mommy and my family and my friends! It's hard for me to go out and make new friends when the friends I already have are so amazing!! So I guess you could say I have kind of high standards when it comes to a person I'm going to spend time with! =)
But this is good for me. This is good for my son. I just wasn't making it in Gaylord anymore. I wasn't happy and I was struggling to get my bills paid and have any sort of money left over. I was not going anywhere with my life and I hated it. I was barely living from paycheck to paycheck. That's not the life I want to live. This is what I had to do for myself and my son! I have been told it was selfish for me to move but really I thought about my son first. My son deserves better than that. How was I supposed to make him happy if I was not happy? How was I supposed to provide for him when I could barely pay my bills? And yes I moved here to be near Joey, but my son loves Joey. I just hate being accused of doing anything that does not benefit my son.
When Joey moved to Chicago we decided it would be best for me to stay in Gaylord because I had a job and a house of my own. Originally Joey was going to come home every weekend and visit. We had it all planned out. But the plans changed. Joey couldn't afford to drive home every single weekend so that turned into every 3 weeks... This was hard for me. Joey was gone and I was left with more bills than I could handle with the income I was bringing in. I couldn't afford my rent. I moved in with Joey's mom. I still could not deal with it. The stress from being away from Joey was really getting to me. I was miserable. So Joey and I made a decision. We decided it would be best for me to come down here where we could worry about supporting just one household instead of 2. And Joey is going to be starting his International training soon which means that he has to either quit his job or cut his hours so he has more study time. He would've been in the same boat I was in. So I moved here. I am with my love and I am happy. Josh is happy to be back with Joey too.
And Joey is good for Josh. He gives him that strong male influence that he needs. My son is very trying. My mom says he reminds her of my brother Johnny as a child... Those of you who knew Johnny as a kid know how difficult he was! lol Josh is very difficult too. He's really hyper and likes things to be his way. He's extremely stubborn and he wants to be the center of attention. He tries my patience on a daily basis. He needs someone to be tough on him, which I am horrible at! lol But even though Joey is more of the disciplinarian than I am Joshua still loves him. A while back he started calling him daddy. At first we didn't encourage it. We wouldn't tell him that Joey wasn't his daddy but we wouldn't say that he was either. Josh was persistent in calling Joey daddy and Joey was fine with it, as am I. So now Josh calls Joey daddy and it's because he is like a daddy to him. He still knows who his real daddy is but he doesn't look at it like that. He tells everyone, "I have 2 daddies!" lol
But anyway I'm rambling on and on about nonsense lol. The point is I miss home and I miss my friends and family, but I'm happy to be here with the man I love and this is good for Josh and I. =)
But this is good for me. This is good for my son. I just wasn't making it in Gaylord anymore. I wasn't happy and I was struggling to get my bills paid and have any sort of money left over. I was not going anywhere with my life and I hated it. I was barely living from paycheck to paycheck. That's not the life I want to live. This is what I had to do for myself and my son! I have been told it was selfish for me to move but really I thought about my son first. My son deserves better than that. How was I supposed to make him happy if I was not happy? How was I supposed to provide for him when I could barely pay my bills? And yes I moved here to be near Joey, but my son loves Joey. I just hate being accused of doing anything that does not benefit my son.
When Joey moved to Chicago we decided it would be best for me to stay in Gaylord because I had a job and a house of my own. Originally Joey was going to come home every weekend and visit. We had it all planned out. But the plans changed. Joey couldn't afford to drive home every single weekend so that turned into every 3 weeks... This was hard for me. Joey was gone and I was left with more bills than I could handle with the income I was bringing in. I couldn't afford my rent. I moved in with Joey's mom. I still could not deal with it. The stress from being away from Joey was really getting to me. I was miserable. So Joey and I made a decision. We decided it would be best for me to come down here where we could worry about supporting just one household instead of 2. And Joey is going to be starting his International training soon which means that he has to either quit his job or cut his hours so he has more study time. He would've been in the same boat I was in. So I moved here. I am with my love and I am happy. Josh is happy to be back with Joey too.
And Joey is good for Josh. He gives him that strong male influence that he needs. My son is very trying. My mom says he reminds her of my brother Johnny as a child... Those of you who knew Johnny as a kid know how difficult he was! lol Josh is very difficult too. He's really hyper and likes things to be his way. He's extremely stubborn and he wants to be the center of attention. He tries my patience on a daily basis. He needs someone to be tough on him, which I am horrible at! lol But even though Joey is more of the disciplinarian than I am Joshua still loves him. A while back he started calling him daddy. At first we didn't encourage it. We wouldn't tell him that Joey wasn't his daddy but we wouldn't say that he was either. Josh was persistent in calling Joey daddy and Joey was fine with it, as am I. So now Josh calls Joey daddy and it's because he is like a daddy to him. He still knows who his real daddy is but he doesn't look at it like that. He tells everyone, "I have 2 daddies!" lol
But anyway I'm rambling on and on about nonsense lol. The point is I miss home and I miss my friends and family, but I'm happy to be here with the man I love and this is good for Josh and I. =)
Friday, February 11, 2011
Lets do this!! =)
So I know that everyone who reads this won't necessarily know me so I'm thinking I should maybe start this off by introducing myself and telling everyone a little about me...
I have a 4 year old son named Joshua James. He is my favorite person in the world! He makes me laugh every day and even when he's driving me nuts I can't help but love his big green eyes. My boyfriend always tells me I'm a pushover because when he gives me those sad eyes I can't help but feel bad! lol
I have a 3 year old step son named Jordan Matthew. He is absolutely frustrating! He's into everything and he could have a room full of toys and still find something to play with that he isn't supposed to have! But I love him like he's my own. He is such a little character and he makes me laugh so much!
And then theres my Joey Michael. He's the best man I've ever met! He treats my son like hes his own and he's an awesome dad to both of them. He makes me laugh everyday and he keeps me sane. I never thought I could feel like this about someone. He does everything he can to make me happy and I love him so much!
And of course me! lol I am 22 years old and I come from a very small town in Northern Michigan. I love my family and my friends. They are probably the best people in the world! My mom is my best friend. She is there for me in any way that she can be and she makes me smile when all I want to do is cry! I just recently moved to Itasca Illinois which is in the suburbs of Chicago! And I'm in a whole new world! There is so much going on all the time! I love it but I do miss my small town where the traffic is minimal and you have plenty of privacy (even though everyone knows everyone!)
I used to blog all of the time on myspace but I'm never on myspace anymore and have switched mainly to facebook which doesn't have blogging. I missed it so I decided to start one up! =)
I have a 4 year old son named Joshua James. He is my favorite person in the world! He makes me laugh every day and even when he's driving me nuts I can't help but love his big green eyes. My boyfriend always tells me I'm a pushover because when he gives me those sad eyes I can't help but feel bad! lol
I have a 3 year old step son named Jordan Matthew. He is absolutely frustrating! He's into everything and he could have a room full of toys and still find something to play with that he isn't supposed to have! But I love him like he's my own. He is such a little character and he makes me laugh so much!
And then theres my Joey Michael. He's the best man I've ever met! He treats my son like hes his own and he's an awesome dad to both of them. He makes me laugh everyday and he keeps me sane. I never thought I could feel like this about someone. He does everything he can to make me happy and I love him so much!
And of course me! lol I am 22 years old and I come from a very small town in Northern Michigan. I love my family and my friends. They are probably the best people in the world! My mom is my best friend. She is there for me in any way that she can be and she makes me smile when all I want to do is cry! I just recently moved to Itasca Illinois which is in the suburbs of Chicago! And I'm in a whole new world! There is so much going on all the time! I love it but I do miss my small town where the traffic is minimal and you have plenty of privacy (even though everyone knows everyone!)
I used to blog all of the time on myspace but I'm never on myspace anymore and have switched mainly to facebook which doesn't have blogging. I missed it so I decided to start one up! =)
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